Hope in the Wilderness

Opportunity is key in escaping difficult realities. Sometimes we must create our own opportunities and struggle with all we have until we emerge.

Felon, Homeless, Addict etc.

I have talked with hundreds of people who feel they are stuck walking in quicksand sinking deeper and deeper.  Stop, are you going to continue walking until the odds of escaping the mud are next to none?  Or, are you going to look for opportunities to escape?  Opportunity is key in escaping difficult realities.  Sometimes we must create our own opportunities and struggle with all we have until we emerge. You can find opportunity regardless of your situation.

Many of us who have a less than desirable past feel guilty and ashamed of our actions and the labels of felon, addict, homeless etc.  These are very real emotions as they are real labels that society feels are acceptable to lay upon us.  From the very start of your journey into a new life you must fight the system.  How do you fight the system?

Ask For Help

There are numerous agencies be it Goodwill’s and other non-profits that have programs to help you get started.  You will also have the option to go back to school, be it college or trade schools.  There are grants that may be available based on your situation.  Stay out of trouble.  Often the mud in our lives at least for me, was trouble with the law.  I had to not only make a life change and live it, I had to literally change my life, embracing, and enjoying my transformation into a being a productive member of society.

Balance The Scales

You have decided to live a better life, done playing games and giving up.  Now comes the hard part.  You created a plan; school, professional help, volunteering etc.  Now you must move forward with your plan.  It may take you an exceptionally long time to start seeing any fruits.  It took me nearly 10 years from the time I was in jail to working as a professional career counselor.  Biggest keys to my success was staying out of trouble and education. I earned two degrees and currently working on a doctorate.

Stay The Course

I was turned down by everyone. I would receive job offers on a regular basis only to be turned down after the background check. Often it is a waiting game. But you do not want to wait and do nothing. While you wait start balancing those scales through education, good service and staying out of trouble.

Get Involved

Get involved in positive community functions.  Find a church, club, or some type of organization that does good works and join in.  You are connecting yourself with good positive people who may have just the right connections to find you that job.  Volunteer at shelters, food pantries, clean up graffiti, pick up trash; just start doing good all over.  Let me tell you these good works will not go unnoticed; you do not need a background check to do good.    

Continue Writing Chapters

All these things I have talked about will start giving you something to write home about.  Listen, everyone loves a good story, but you know what people love more?  A story in which a guy is fucked up and then builds himself up and becomes the hero.  What kind of hero do you want to be?  That is up for you to decide.  Regardless, you will start automatically attracting good things as your story becomes more and more convincing. You are not that fucked up guy anymore but a person of action, change and inspiration.

You can do it, there is hope and your story has just begun!

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Where Am I? How Did I Get Here?

Where am I? How did I get here?  I am approaching 40 years on this earth and I am trying to figure out what the hell is going on.  I am sure many people feel the same.  Over the years I have observed many strange behaviors on this planet; wondering why people do what they do.  Whatever the purpose was for my existence I find myself more eager for the mother ship.  Now I know that this sounds like talk from someone mentally ill or disturbed.  Is it?  Have you looked around and contemplated this perceived reality and just said; what the fuck? 

Everything Humans teach is a Lie

Everything humans teach is a lie.  Their history, religions, monetary systems, politics, their beliefs on food, drugs and spirituality, all of it seems to be self-serving.  Humans are born with an ego in which drives their sufferings; with meat sack bodies that decay over time.  They do this thing called work which is centered on competition tearing each other apart.  They are trapped on a rock flying around a fiery inferno at thousands of miles per hour.  I would think they would work to make their lives better.  Instead they behave in a manner of less intelligent animals which they coexist with.  I should not be so surprised man seems to function little better than ravenous wolves.      

Humanity lives in a dog eat dog world.  They trick themselves to believe they must work 40 hours or more every week keep subservient to employers who don’t give a flying fuck. They replace each other with someone more productive when one falls short.  God forbid a person is depressed, going through a family crisis or just having some bad days.  It is no wonder half of them are on Prozac, alcohol and other pain reliving drugs.  I do not blame them for their self-destructive attitudes.  Since I have been here I have been forced into their regiment often relying on their methods of coping.   

I do not understand why they do not move at a slower pace?  Why don’t they spend the first half hour of their work day in meditation?  Most of them only receive a half hour unpaid lunch in which they scarf down food; it is no wonder they have intestinal problems.  They are also not compensated when their bodies start to fail.  This is what they call retirement.  They spend their days when their bodies are healthy doing stupid shit they do not want to do, then spend their final years with broken bodies trying to do what they always wanted.

Humans Find A Strange Peace In Religion.

Humans find a strange peace in religion.  They have hundreds of them.  These philosophies of peace however are the cause of most of their wars.  Again, I ask, where the fuck am I and how can I get home?  None of this seems to make sense.  This is not the way I want to live; I do not want to spend my days doing dumb shit, being subjected to stress, the pain of this body and a society which is animalistic in their self-seeking.  Who want to get up day after fucking day to do it again and again until you die or retire?  If I am lucky I will receive 10 years on a fixed budget before this body fails.

I know I have been negative.  Why shouldn’t I?  Life is suffering they say.  It is bad enough they are born grow to about 30 or less then start falling apart.  If the biology is not suffering enough, they pour suffering upon one another.  Ok, ok, enough of the negativity.  I do not have all the answers; I am new to this world.   

Maybe They Should Seek Within Themselves.

Maybe they should seek within themselves?  Develop a path in which they convert ego into Spirit.  They have had many great sages which transcended the traditional human.  One of these was Jesus.  Jesus had many great examples found in the gospel text.  This, before so called doctors of the church interpreted the teachings to be more in line with the wicked world.  Jesus said the kingdom is within.   Jesus and other great teachers taught to live a life of meditation, prayer, giving and receiving with gratefulness.  They taught love, to seek the interest of others not themselves.  These teachings from great spiritual leaders are opposite to this current world. 

The human should live to serve one another instead of stealing from each other.  In their Christian tradition they are taught to love one another.  Loving one another would mean developing constructive work that is meaningful.  If they would stop competing for money; rather compete for the greater good of all people.  Accepting each other for who we they are, regardless of their views; all humanity working together for each other.  It is time they get the priorities of the human race straight; returning to the spirituality in which they come.  If this is done, I would not mind living on this rock for a little while longer.           

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Finding Your Purpose

We put on a costume every day and act out a role. I do not care if you work at McDonald’s or you are a medical doctor, it is a role you play.

We have all heard phrase “I do not know what I want to be when I grow up.”  I am sure you also have said this on more than one occasion.  I know up until recently I have.  I have also heard people as old as 60+ still trying to figure out what they want to be.  It is interesting that we as a society put so much emphasis on what we are going to be, generally referring to an occupation.  Our occupations seem to define yet we are never happy.  We put on a costume every day and act out a role.  I do not care if you work at McDonald’s or you are a medical doctor, it is a role you play. 

If you are lucky enough to achieve the “dream job” you have always wanted, you probably will not be 100% satisfied.  You may still not know if this is you.  You may take on the professional roles such as an attorney, medical doctor, business manager etc.  You say I am a doctor or lawyer or truck driver.  Yes, you do those roles but is that really you?  I would argue that it is not you; rather, it is a role you play in society in order to make money so you can feed yourself.  We are trained this way since early childhood.  The sole purpose around our education system is to grow up and be something you are really not.  We are all a bunch of liars. 

When going to our perspective places of work, we all put on a show.  We are then watched by HR who is the biggest liars; who make sure we are lying correctly.  Don’t say this, don’t do that, don’t be you.  Who are you?  We do not know because we were never trained to be (add your name).  We were trained to be an occupation.  We live in a matrix like environment in which we must submit to societal norms or be cast out like a leper ending up in a homeless shelter.  Generally your only crime was you were just being yourself, or at least enough of yourself not to care about what society says you should be. 

We all need to eat, and while I have met many happy people who enjoy the homeless lifestyle it is not for everyone.  I myself was homeless for a short period of time and it did have its moments of freedom.  Although the luxuries of life were often missed; missed so much in fact that I decided to join back in with the matrix and learn a gig.  I am very fortunate that I have started to grow in my spirituality which has led me to a greater understanding of myself and the conclusions that I have stated above.

I am learning that my life’s purpose is to just be me. I am not a writer, student, counselor, teacher etc. I may do those things, but they are just actions that I do to make money in order to feed myself. I was most truly myself at the time of my birth, untainted by the corruption of our humanity.  We are tainted by our educational, monetary and government systems into being ego driven sociopaths only looking out for a ourselves.  What is worse we do not even know who we are.  Today we have a growing number of people who suffer with depression and anxiety than ever before.  We have an alarming amount of people succumb to suicide.  We believe we must work 30+years then retire and die.  Sadly most never learn who they really are. 

Just be.  That’s it. Just be.  I do not expect anything out of you other than you just being you.  Seek within.  Jesus said the Kingdom of heaven s within.  Within is found our true and highest self.  A self that has been clothed with the world we live in. When taking path less traveled you must go through stages of disrobing.  We then are left naked with our egos brought down and nailed upon the cross. We have returned to the state of our birth. A sense of freedom comes from taking of the layers of deceit.  Removing the worldly clothes from our ego can be frightening as we will eventually view ourselves for who we truly are.

There are many steps a person can take towards understanding who they truly are.  They can be found in the religions of the world as well as various occult orders.  We may learn in gradually becoming curious of this unknown world within.  This by the way is what happened to me.  Once a conservative seminary student with aspirations of the pastorate; I realized I was learning many great truths but the organized Christianity I was a part of was not Christian at all.  I let go of what I thought, I wanted to just be! I am a perfect spirit and so are you!  Just be.  Let go.  You have found your purpose.  In fact you never lost it.  Your purpose is to be you.  Now live you and don’t look back!                      

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